So. . . I'm Twenty-Seven Now. . .

Actually, I've been twenty-seven since last Thursday. I was going to do a post on it, but, well. . .

Anyway. I just finished up the last of my marking for the year-- possibly EVER-- and have already got both my Japanese oral exam and Japanese skit behind me. The skit was videotaped, but I can't put it up, due both to the video being listed as private and me looking and sounding incredibly ugly on videotape.

All that remains now is my Japanese written exam, immediately after which I will be heading down to Victoria help my sister move back up to Prince George for the summer.

Oh. . . and I'm working on the next part of Sailor Moon, which is nearing completion.

And as before, I will provide you with a preview of what's to come. Heavily sarcastic, only tangentially related to the actual script, you know the drill. Enjoy!

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USAGI, angrily, throws her Japanese textbook against a tree, causing it ot unbind. AMI approaches, offering her own book. The Boss starts playing in the background.

AMI

Hello.

USAGI

Hmm?

AMI

Here.

BRUCE SPRINGSTEEN

She'll let you in her house...

USAGI

What is it?

BRUUUUUUCE!

If you come knocking late at night...

AMI

My book. You can have it for now.

USAGI

Oh. Thanks.

THE BOSS!

She'll let you in her mouth...

AMI

Listen. . .

SPRINGSTEEN

If the words you say are right...

AMI

I know people say things about you.

SPRINGSTEEN

If you pay the price...

AMI

Mean things.

SPRINGSTEEN

She'll let you deep inside. . .

AMI

But I just want want you to--

USAGI

Shut up. Just shut up.

SPRINGSTEEN

But there's a secret garden she has.

USAGI

You had me at hello.

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CUT TO:

MAMORU'S POV. We see CHRISTOPHER WALKEN, who makes for a very unconvincing Japanese War veteran, talking to Mamoru.

CHRISTOPHER WALKEN

Hello, little man. Boy, I sure heard a bunch about you. See, I was a good friend of your dad's. We were in that Guadalcanal pit of hell together over five years. Hopefully...you'll never have to experience this yourself, but when two men are in a situation like me and your Dad were, for as long as we were, you take on certain responsibilities of the other. If it had been me who had not made it, Major Chiba would be talkin' right now to my son Jin. But the way it turned out is I'm talkin' to you, Mamoru. I got somethin' for you.

WALKEN sits down and pulls out a star-shaped watch.

This watch I got here was first purchased by your great-grandfather during the first World War. It was bought in a little general store in Kanagawa prefecture. Made by the first company to ever make wrist watches. Right here in Japan. Up till then people just carried pocket watches. It was bought by private Doughboy Shinji Chiba on the day he set sail for Tsingtao. It was your great-grandfather's war watch and he wore it everyday he was in that war. When he had done his duty, he went home to your great-grandmother, took the watch off, put it an old tea pot, and in that pot it stayed 'til your granddad Kenzuo Chiba was called upon by his country to go overseas and fight the Chinese once again. This time they called it the Sino-Japanese War. Your great-grandfather gave this watch to your granddad for good luck. Unfortunately, Kenzuo's luck wasn't as good as his old man's. Kenzuo was a soldier and he was killed -- along with the other soldiers at the battle of Shanghai. Your granddad was facing death, he knew it. None of those boys had any illusions about ever leavin' that island alive. So three days before the Chinese finally took the city, your granddad asked a gunner on an Imerpial Navy transport by the name of Takeshi, a man he had never met before in his life, to deliver to his infant son, who he'd never seen in the flesh, his gold watch. Three days later, your granddad was dead. But Takeshi kept his word. Once the new war, this one called World War II, began he paid a visit to your grandmother, delivering to your father, his Dad's gold watch. This watch.

(holds it up, long pause)

This watch was on your Daddy's wrist when he was shot down over Guadalcanal. He was captured, put in an American prison camp. He knew if the Yanks ever saw the watch it'd be confiscated, taken away. The way your Dad looked at it, that watch was your birthright. He'd be damned if any crackers were gonna put their greasy honky hands on his boy's birthright. So he hid it in the one place he knew he could hide something. His ass. Three long years, he wore this watch up his ass. Then he died of dysentery, he gave me the watch. I hid this uncomfortable hunk of metal up my ass two years. Then, after five years, I was sent home to my family. And now, little man, I give the watch to you.

MAMORU takes it.

MAMORU

That story didn't make any damn sense.

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AMI is walking through a hallway in the middle a hospital oncology ward. She spots an intern.

AMI

Excuse me?

JON (J.D.) DORIAN

Yes?

AMI

I'm looking for my mother, Dr. Mizuno. Do you know where she is?

J.D.

Listen. . .

J.D. kneels down.

J.D.

It's probably better if you--

The air is pierced by a sharp, loud whistle.

DR. COX

Newbie!

J.D.

Dr. Cox, I was--

DR. COX

You, Keiko, were trying, in vain, to gain some measure of control over the vast tsunami of hormones that flooded your veins the very moment you laid your eyes on this little girl and your ovaries, spurred no doubt by your as yet latent-- nay, repressed-- maternal instincts, shifted into overdrive. And while I sympathize-- you're not the first woman doctor I've ever met, after all-- you might want to keep in mind that this place, here, with all the nurses and dying people and very smart competent people in white coats-- they're the ones called "doctors"-- passing through the halls, is called a "hospital." And since you too, while lacking the aforementioned smarts and competence, are also wearing a nice white coat, one assumes that you are also one of these "doctors," and therefore I should mention that your job as a "doctor," while entailing many many many many MANY responsibilities clearly beyond your feeble comprehension, does NOT include humouring the eight year old who will be your boss by the time she is a twelve year old. Now begone.

J.D.

Dr Cox--

DR. COX

You have until the count of BEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE--

J.D. runs off.

DR. COX

--GOOOONE!

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In the foreground, DAWSON and JOEY are sitting on the bed. Talking to eachother. In the background, LUNA is trying to climb inside through a small window. Paula Cole is playing in the background.

JOEY

You mean, you haven't even kissed that girl?

DAWSON

It's not about the kiss Joey. It's about the journey, creating a sustaining magic.

JOEY

Does Jen fall for this warped movie logic?

DAWSON

It's not warped. It's romance.

JOEY

It's old, Dawson. Just kiss her, will you? Take the elevator to the next floor and get off, it's time.

DAWSON

It's not that simple Joey. It's about creating the perfect moment. And it has to be planned with the right music and dialogue.

JOEY

You can't storyboard a kiss.

DAWSON

Sure, you can.

JOEY

It's not reality, Dawson. These movies that you're watching are false images that don't exist outside the city limits of Hollywood.

DAWSON

Not true. They're images grounded in the reality of imagination.

JOEY

Did you just pull that one out of your butt, or what?

DAWSON

Everybody thinks that movies are fantasy, but they don't have to be. From here to eternity. You can have that. You just have to create it. That moment on the beach could be yours. You could be Deborah Kerr.

JOEY

Mm, sand in my crotch, heaven.

DAWSON

You know, it's attitudes like yours that prevent storyboard romances from happening. You're way too cynic--

At that moment, LUNA finally makes it inside, landing on the floor with a thud. DAWSON and JOEY turn towards LUNA, she toward them.

LUNA

Your show sucked in the nineties and it sucks now.

LUNA leaves.

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LUNA and USAGI are sitting on the bed. USAGI examines the MOON PRISM in her hand.

LUNA

Usagi. . . think of this as a . . . prism. A lens. And your past life is like the light of a long dead star that's just reaching the Earth.

USAGI

Wait, what?

LUNA

As it is, a few photons, scattered here and there, will hit the Earth's surface, but when focussed, you can see the light of the star, and it's as it it lives again.

USAGI

Why can't I just look up and see the star?

LUNA

It's. . . really far away. Like another galaxy. Anyway--

USAGI

I thought I was this past life reborn, so what does that make me, a neutron star? A white dwarf? A black hole?

LUNA

Usagi--

USAGI

Did the star supernova and leave behind a nebula? Am I then just a cluster of blue giant stars that formed in its wake?

LUNA

Usagi!

USAGI

Or am I just a piece of photographic film onto which this "lens" can form a pict--

USAGI

USAGI IT'S A FUCKING METAPHOR!

Looooong pause.

Then. . .

USAGI

No it's not.

LUNA

. . . what?

USAGI

"Think of this AS a prism?" "Your past life is LIKE the light of a long dead star?" Those are SIMILIES, Luna.

LUNA'S head explodes. . . metaphorically speaking.