The Nuances of Japanese Job Interviews = Comic Gold!

Last time. . .

We Now Continue.

CUT TO:

EXT, Sidewalk, Day

Long shot of USAGI, sitting on the opposite end of the sidewalk from a PHONE BOOTH. Usagi’s hair has been fixed up, her uniform has been cleaned, and subtle make-up has been applied by Makoto; she wants Usagi to look good-- why, we don’t know. The sidewalk is noticeably bare of people. Inside the phone booth, we see MAKOTO talking on the phone, her hand covering the mouthpiece. She glances nervously at USAGI from time to time. USAGI, bored and anxious, looks around. She spots a BLACK CAT in the distance, walking toward her. USAGI holds her gaze on the cat—then she hears MAKOTO raising her voice angrily into the phone. After a moment, Makoto calms down, and after a few more words, hangs up the phone and opens the booth door. We now see that she is wearing a dark green dress suit.

MAKOTO

(sighs)

Sorry ‘bout that.

(beat, then gestures to the booth)

Beats a phone bill every month.

(Ed: Yeah. . . I’m just gonna forget about her cell phone. Another great/frustrating thing about first drafts.)

USAGI briefly glances toward the black cat, just in time to see it run down a back street. Usagi laughs bitterly at herself.

MAKOTO

My, uh. . .

(dissembling)

My interview’s been bumped up to noon. So. . . Whaddaya wanna do ‘till then?

USAGI

Makoto, I . . .

(beat)

Why am I coming with you, again?

MAKOTO

Well. . .

Makoto hesitates—she really doesn’t have a good answer.

MAKOTO

Usagi. . . look around.

(beat)

It’s a bad idea to be alone right now.

USAGI

Oh. Okay.

Usagi stands up.

USAGI

And. . . what, it’s a perfect day for a job interview?

MAKOTO

Look, I didn’t want to leave you sitting in the apartment, okay? And I’m not staying up there all day.

USAGI

Fine.

Usagi starts to walk off, but briefly turns around.

USAGI

Look, thanks for dinner and. . . and everything. But. . .

MAKOTO

Usagi!

(sighs)

All right-- you want to know why you’re coming with me?

(beat)

Moral support.

USAGI

(incredulous)

“Moral support”?

MAKOTO

Yeah, “moral support”!

(beat)

Can’t you tell? I’m a nervous wreck.

USAGI

. . . Makoto, I watched you fight off three people with your bare hands.

MAKOTO

Well, I can see you’ve never had to go through a Japanese job interview. Here, I’ll give you a taste.

Makoto retreats back into the phone booth. Makoto knocks on the phone booth door from the inside. Usagi has no idea what this means.

MAKOTO

(peeking through the door)

Say “come in”!

MAKOTO closes the door,

USAGI

(confused; looks around)

. . .Doozo?

MAKOTO exits the phone booth, carrying an air of Japanese feminine humility so extreme its jarring.

MAKOTO

(soft, barely audible, little eye contact)

Shitsuree itashimasu.

Makoto bows demurely. Usagi, confused, bows.

USAGI

. . . Ohayoo gozaimasu?

MAKOTO breaks character, placing her hands on her hips and pushing out her chest—a Japanese caricature of authority.

USAGI

(mimicking the gesture in confusion)

. . . O. . .hayoo?

MAKOTO

(whispering, never breaking her polite facade)

You don’t greet me.

USAGI

. . . Oh.

MAKOTO

. . . You invite me in to have a seat.

USAGI

Oh! Uh. . .

(gesturing to imaginary seat)

Doozo?

MAKOTO makes the authority figure gesture again.

MAKOTO

“Okakekudasai”!

USAGI

(hands on hips)

Okakekudasai!

MAKOTO

Shitsuree itashimasu.

Makoto gently closes the door to the phone booth, gracefully walks up to Usagi, and bows once more.

MAKOTO

. . . See, I have to apologize to you for making you invite me in--

USAGI

(abruptly)

Makoto. . .

(sighs, then seemingly upset)

What is this?

(pause)

My office is a sidewalk. This company has no future. Get out while you can.

MAKOTO breaks character and laughs, relieved to see Usagi is (slightly) better spirits.

CUT TO:

INT, Mundy Residence, Usagi’s Room

LUNA pops up from underneath Usagi’s bed to check whether she’s returned. The bed is empty.

CUT TO:

EXT, Mundy Residence, Day

LUNA walks down the lawn, taking one last look at the house. She’s torn—on the one hand, she may have finally found proof that Sailor V, the one she’s been searching for her whole life, really is still out there. On the other hand, Usagi is still missing, and Luna knows that on some levels, it’s her fault. After a moment, Luna forces herself onward.

CUT TO:

INT, Crown Arcade

With school cancelled, the arcade is packed with teenagers. MOTOKI is literally run off his feet.

MOTOKI

(to another employee)

Cancel school. Keep kids safely indoors, at home, until the state of emergency is resolved.

(beat, looks at the hordes of kids)

I think it worked.

CUT TO:

Usagi leading Makoto through the arcade.

MAKOTO

I really don’t know if I this is for me—

USAGI

You’ve gotta you’re options open! You may not get that other job.

Makoto glances sideways, as if hiding something.

USAGI

Besides. . . I got connections.

CUT TO:

Motoki at work on some chore. Usagi appears behind him.

USAGI

Motoki!

MOTOKI winces.

MOTOKI

(gritting teeth)

Oh joy.

(facing Usagi, with insincere grin)

Usagi!

USAGI

Motoki, there’s someone I want you meet.

MOTOKI

Usagi, I really am busy right--

Usagi disappears behind a video game machine.

MOTOKI

--and I’m letting this happen. That’s management material.

A second later, Usagi pulls out Makoto from behind the game machine.

USAGI

Motoki, this is Makoto Kino.

Makoto bows, putting on her feminine act. Motoki, love-struck idiot that he is, takes a moment to process the opportunity he has been handed.

MAKOTO

Shitsuree itashimasu.

MOTOKI

(abrupt)

Ah!-- Ohayoo Gozaimasu!

Motoki bows. Makoto, noticing Motoki made the same mistake as Usagi, tries not to laugh.

MOTOKI

Hajime—uh, well, we. . .

Usagi walks up behind Motoki, still facing Makoto.

MOTOKI

We’ve already. . . kind of--

USAGI

(to Motoki)

She’s young. . . energetic. . . and looking to join the workforce.

MOTOKI

That’s. . .

(claps hands)

Great! That’s really. . . yeah, we need. . . young people, with energy. . . working.

You could cut the awkwardness with a knife. Makoto pretends to look through her bag.

MAKOTO

(faking)

Ah!

(beat)

Whaddaya know. . . forgot to bring a resume!

MOTOKI

Oh, *pfft*. . . “resumes”. . .

(waves his hand)

Relics! . . . what with the. . . Facebook. . . Who needs ‘em?

Makoto glances at Usagi, standing behind Motoki. Usagi gives the thumbs up.