I've created a new label, SM Script, for all script snippets posted to this blog. I've also posted links to every script snippet entry below, in chronological order from top to bottom:
I'm Actually Doing it!!
THIS is the best Tuxedo Kamen motivational poster parody I could find. . .
What Follows is Boring, but Neccessary
There's Something Here For All You Dawson's Creek Lovers Out There!
Flashes V for Victory! Every week a Fantastic Story! It's Hard to Think of Things That Rhyme With "V"! She is the One Named Sailor V!
There's One Place Where I Could Have Really Easily Made A "Cat Got Your Tongue?" Joke, but I Didn't, and I'm Proud of That.
Every Day I Get in the Queue. . . To Get on the Bus That Takes Me to You.
More Rei-cism
In the Cosmological Justice System, the Universe is Represented by Two Sepearte Yet Equally Important Groups. . . CHUNG CHUNG!
Just To Be Clear, Evolution Doesn't Really Work This Way
The Same Thing We Do Every Night, Pinky. . .
I Should Not Write the Sailor Moon Movie (but I'm going to anyway. . .)
What Follows is Again Boring, but Again Neccessary
Wherein I Parody the Entire Sailor Moon Franchise in Under Five Minutes!
Did I Mention That I'm Picturing George Takei as Dr. Tomoe?
Let the Fun Begin!
I'm trying to get one of these out per day.
Did You Know That the Actress Who Played Sailor Mars in PGSM was in Fast and the Furious: Tokyo Drift? Well, You Do Now!
Yeah, It's Three Days Later. Whatever.
These Are Getting Shorter and Shorter. . .
The Stuff of Legend
More First Draft Badness!
Insert Your Own Witty David Lynch Reference!
I hope I haven't given too much away. . .
Why is it That So Few Saturday Morning Cartoon Villains Have a Catchy Name for Their Lairs?
You Can Use Music from Sunshine to Make Anything Badass.
You Can Also Use Music from Inception to Make Anything Badass. . . But I Won't This Time.
The "Sunshine" Post Went Over Really Well With My Mom So Here's More Music I Like
Just in Time for Mother's Day: The Ongoing Soap Opera of People Who Technically Don't Have Mothers
Yes, I HAVE Injected Backroom City Politics into your Escapist Magical Shoujo Fantasy!
No, Makoto Don't Want no Scrubs. A Scrub is a Guy Who Can't Get No Love From She.
There's actually a major plot point here! Foreshadowing! Ooooh!
They Said the F-word in the Manga Too, Y'know.
If You Start Hearing "Eye of the Tiger" in Your Head as you Read This, Then You Have Missed The Point
More Important Foreshadowing. Trust me!
This may be the shortest script snippet yet.
I'm on a Boat!
Can You Believe I Only Just Now Started Watching Battlestar Galactica?
You know, one of the first films I remember seeing in theatres was Searching for Bobby Fisher. . .
Yeah. . this'll come WAY earlier in the second draft.
I couldn't just make up an African country that didn't sound really silly. . .
The Nuances of Japanese Job Interviews = Comic Gold!
Wednesday, August 24, 2011
Monday, August 22, 2011
The Nuances of Japanese Job Interviews = Comic Gold!
Last time. . .
We Now Continue.
CUT TO:
EXT, Sidewalk, Day
Long shot of USAGI, sitting on the opposite end of the sidewalk from a PHONE BOOTH. Usagi’s hair has been fixed up, her uniform has been cleaned, and subtle make-up has been applied by Makoto; she wants Usagi to look good-- why, we don’t know. The sidewalk is noticeably bare of people. Inside the phone booth, we see MAKOTO talking on the phone, her hand covering the mouthpiece. She glances nervously at USAGI from time to time. USAGI, bored and anxious, looks around. She spots a BLACK CAT in the distance, walking toward her. USAGI holds her gaze on the cat—then she hears MAKOTO raising her voice angrily into the phone. After a moment, Makoto calms down, and after a few more words, hangs up the phone and opens the booth door. We now see that she is wearing a dark green dress suit.
MAKOTO
(sighs)
Sorry ‘bout that.
(beat, then gestures to the booth)
Beats a phone bill every month.
(Ed: Yeah. . . I’m just gonna forget about her cell phone. Another great/frustrating thing about first drafts.)
USAGI briefly glances toward the black cat, just in time to see it run down a back street. Usagi laughs bitterly at herself.
MAKOTO
My, uh. . .
(dissembling)
My interview’s been bumped up to noon. So. . . Whaddaya wanna do ‘till then?
USAGI
Makoto, I . . .
(beat)
Why am I coming with you, again?
MAKOTO
Well. . .
Makoto hesitates—she really doesn’t have a good answer.
MAKOTO
Usagi. . . look around.
(beat)
It’s a bad idea to be alone right now.
USAGI
Oh. Okay.
Usagi stands up.
USAGI
And. . . what, it’s a perfect day for a job interview?
MAKOTO
Look, I didn’t want to leave you sitting in the apartment, okay? And I’m not staying up there all day.
USAGI
Fine.
Usagi starts to walk off, but briefly turns around.
USAGI
Look, thanks for dinner and. . . and everything. But. . .
MAKOTO
Usagi!
(sighs)
All right-- you want to know why you’re coming with me?
(beat)
Moral support.
USAGI
(incredulous)
“Moral support”?
MAKOTO
Yeah, “moral support”!
(beat)
Can’t you tell? I’m a nervous wreck.
USAGI
. . . Makoto, I watched you fight off three people with your bare hands.
MAKOTO
Well, I can see you’ve never had to go through a Japanese job interview. Here, I’ll give you a taste.
Makoto retreats back into the phone booth. Makoto knocks on the phone booth door from the inside. Usagi has no idea what this means.
MAKOTO
(peeking through the door)
Say “come in”!
MAKOTO closes the door,
USAGI
(confused; looks around)
. . .Doozo?
MAKOTO exits the phone booth, carrying an air of Japanese feminine humility so extreme its jarring.
MAKOTO
(soft, barely audible, little eye contact)
Shitsuree itashimasu.
Makoto bows demurely. Usagi, confused, bows.
USAGI
. . . Ohayoo gozaimasu?
MAKOTO breaks character, placing her hands on her hips and pushing out her chest—a Japanese caricature of authority.
USAGI
(mimicking the gesture in confusion)
. . . O. . .hayoo?
MAKOTO
(whispering, never breaking her polite facade)
You don’t greet me.
USAGI
. . . Oh.
MAKOTO
. . . You invite me in to have a seat.
USAGI
Oh! Uh. . .
(gesturing to imaginary seat)
Doozo?
MAKOTO makes the authority figure gesture again.
MAKOTO
“Okakekudasai”!
USAGI
(hands on hips)
Okakekudasai!
MAKOTO
Shitsuree itashimasu.
Makoto gently closes the door to the phone booth, gracefully walks up to Usagi, and bows once more.
MAKOTO
. . . See, I have to apologize to you for making you invite me in--
USAGI
(abruptly)
Makoto. . .
(sighs, then seemingly upset)
What is this?
(pause)
My office is a sidewalk. This company has no future. Get out while you can.
MAKOTO breaks character and laughs, relieved to see Usagi is (slightly) better spirits.
CUT TO:
INT, Mundy Residence, Usagi’s Room
LUNA pops up from underneath Usagi’s bed to check whether she’s returned. The bed is empty.
CUT TO:
EXT, Mundy Residence, Day
LUNA walks down the lawn, taking one last look at the house. She’s torn—on the one hand, she may have finally found proof that Sailor V, the one she’s been searching for her whole life, really is still out there. On the other hand, Usagi is still missing, and Luna knows that on some levels, it’s her fault. After a moment, Luna forces herself onward.
CUT TO:
INT, Crown Arcade
With school cancelled, the arcade is packed with teenagers. MOTOKI is literally run off his feet.
MOTOKI
(to another employee)
Cancel school. Keep kids safely indoors, at home, until the state of emergency is resolved.
(beat, looks at the hordes of kids)
I think it worked.
CUT TO:
Usagi leading Makoto through the arcade.
MAKOTO
I really don’t know if I this is for me—
USAGI
You’ve gotta you’re options open! You may not get that other job.
Makoto glances sideways, as if hiding something.
USAGI
Besides. . . I got connections.
CUT TO:
Motoki at work on some chore. Usagi appears behind him.
USAGI
Motoki!
MOTOKI winces.
MOTOKI
(gritting teeth)
Oh joy.
(facing Usagi, with insincere grin)
Usagi!
USAGI
Motoki, there’s someone I want you meet.
MOTOKI
Usagi, I really am busy right--
Usagi disappears behind a video game machine.
MOTOKI
--and I’m letting this happen. That’s management material.
A second later, Usagi pulls out Makoto from behind the game machine.
USAGI
Motoki, this is Makoto Kino.
Makoto bows, putting on her feminine act. Motoki, love-struck idiot that he is, takes a moment to process the opportunity he has been handed.
MAKOTO
Shitsuree itashimasu.
MOTOKI
(abrupt)
Ah!-- Ohayoo Gozaimasu!
Motoki bows. Makoto, noticing Motoki made the same mistake as Usagi, tries not to laugh.
MOTOKI
Hajime—uh, well, we. . .
Usagi walks up behind Motoki, still facing Makoto.
MOTOKI
We’ve already. . . kind of--
USAGI
(to Motoki)
She’s young. . . energetic. . . and looking to join the workforce.
MOTOKI
That’s. . .
(claps hands)
Great! That’s really. . . yeah, we need. . . young people, with energy. . . working.
You could cut the awkwardness with a knife. Makoto pretends to look through her bag.
MAKOTO
(faking)
Ah!
(beat)
Whaddaya know. . . forgot to bring a resume!
MOTOKI
Oh, *pfft*. . . “resumes”. . .
(waves his hand)
Relics! . . . what with the. . . Facebook. . . Who needs ‘em?
Makoto glances at Usagi, standing behind Motoki. Usagi gives the thumbs up.
We Now Continue.
CUT TO:
EXT, Sidewalk, Day
Long shot of USAGI, sitting on the opposite end of the sidewalk from a PHONE BOOTH. Usagi’s hair has been fixed up, her uniform has been cleaned, and subtle make-up has been applied by Makoto; she wants Usagi to look good-- why, we don’t know. The sidewalk is noticeably bare of people. Inside the phone booth, we see MAKOTO talking on the phone, her hand covering the mouthpiece. She glances nervously at USAGI from time to time. USAGI, bored and anxious, looks around. She spots a BLACK CAT in the distance, walking toward her. USAGI holds her gaze on the cat—then she hears MAKOTO raising her voice angrily into the phone. After a moment, Makoto calms down, and after a few more words, hangs up the phone and opens the booth door. We now see that she is wearing a dark green dress suit.
MAKOTO
(sighs)
Sorry ‘bout that.
(beat, then gestures to the booth)
Beats a phone bill every month.
(Ed: Yeah. . . I’m just gonna forget about her cell phone. Another great/frustrating thing about first drafts.)
USAGI briefly glances toward the black cat, just in time to see it run down a back street. Usagi laughs bitterly at herself.
MAKOTO
My, uh. . .
(dissembling)
My interview’s been bumped up to noon. So. . . Whaddaya wanna do ‘till then?
USAGI
Makoto, I . . .
(beat)
Why am I coming with you, again?
MAKOTO
Well. . .
Makoto hesitates—she really doesn’t have a good answer.
MAKOTO
Usagi. . . look around.
(beat)
It’s a bad idea to be alone right now.
USAGI
Oh. Okay.
Usagi stands up.
USAGI
And. . . what, it’s a perfect day for a job interview?
MAKOTO
Look, I didn’t want to leave you sitting in the apartment, okay? And I’m not staying up there all day.
USAGI
Fine.
Usagi starts to walk off, but briefly turns around.
USAGI
Look, thanks for dinner and. . . and everything. But. . .
MAKOTO
Usagi!
(sighs)
All right-- you want to know why you’re coming with me?
(beat)
Moral support.
USAGI
(incredulous)
“Moral support”?
MAKOTO
Yeah, “moral support”!
(beat)
Can’t you tell? I’m a nervous wreck.
USAGI
. . . Makoto, I watched you fight off three people with your bare hands.
MAKOTO
Well, I can see you’ve never had to go through a Japanese job interview. Here, I’ll give you a taste.
Makoto retreats back into the phone booth. Makoto knocks on the phone booth door from the inside. Usagi has no idea what this means.
MAKOTO
(peeking through the door)
Say “come in”!
MAKOTO closes the door,
USAGI
(confused; looks around)
. . .Doozo?
MAKOTO exits the phone booth, carrying an air of Japanese feminine humility so extreme its jarring.
MAKOTO
(soft, barely audible, little eye contact)
Shitsuree itashimasu.
Makoto bows demurely. Usagi, confused, bows.
USAGI
. . . Ohayoo gozaimasu?
MAKOTO breaks character, placing her hands on her hips and pushing out her chest—a Japanese caricature of authority.
USAGI
(mimicking the gesture in confusion)
. . . O. . .hayoo?
MAKOTO
(whispering, never breaking her polite facade)
You don’t greet me.
USAGI
. . . Oh.
MAKOTO
. . . You invite me in to have a seat.
USAGI
Oh! Uh. . .
(gesturing to imaginary seat)
Doozo?
MAKOTO makes the authority figure gesture again.
MAKOTO
“Okakekudasai”!
USAGI
(hands on hips)
Okakekudasai!
MAKOTO
Shitsuree itashimasu.
Makoto gently closes the door to the phone booth, gracefully walks up to Usagi, and bows once more.
MAKOTO
. . . See, I have to apologize to you for making you invite me in--
USAGI
(abruptly)
Makoto. . .
(sighs, then seemingly upset)
What is this?
(pause)
My office is a sidewalk. This company has no future. Get out while you can.
MAKOTO breaks character and laughs, relieved to see Usagi is (slightly) better spirits.
CUT TO:
INT, Mundy Residence, Usagi’s Room
LUNA pops up from underneath Usagi’s bed to check whether she’s returned. The bed is empty.
CUT TO:
EXT, Mundy Residence, Day
LUNA walks down the lawn, taking one last look at the house. She’s torn—on the one hand, she may have finally found proof that Sailor V, the one she’s been searching for her whole life, really is still out there. On the other hand, Usagi is still missing, and Luna knows that on some levels, it’s her fault. After a moment, Luna forces herself onward.
CUT TO:
INT, Crown Arcade
With school cancelled, the arcade is packed with teenagers. MOTOKI is literally run off his feet.
MOTOKI
(to another employee)
Cancel school. Keep kids safely indoors, at home, until the state of emergency is resolved.
(beat, looks at the hordes of kids)
I think it worked.
CUT TO:
Usagi leading Makoto through the arcade.
MAKOTO
I really don’t know if I this is for me—
USAGI
You’ve gotta you’re options open! You may not get that other job.
Makoto glances sideways, as if hiding something.
USAGI
Besides. . . I got connections.
CUT TO:
Motoki at work on some chore. Usagi appears behind him.
USAGI
Motoki!
MOTOKI winces.
MOTOKI
(gritting teeth)
Oh joy.
(facing Usagi, with insincere grin)
Usagi!
USAGI
Motoki, there’s someone I want you meet.
MOTOKI
Usagi, I really am busy right--
Usagi disappears behind a video game machine.
MOTOKI
--and I’m letting this happen. That’s management material.
A second later, Usagi pulls out Makoto from behind the game machine.
USAGI
Motoki, this is Makoto Kino.
Makoto bows, putting on her feminine act. Motoki, love-struck idiot that he is, takes a moment to process the opportunity he has been handed.
MAKOTO
Shitsuree itashimasu.
MOTOKI
(abrupt)
Ah!-- Ohayoo Gozaimasu!
Motoki bows. Makoto, noticing Motoki made the same mistake as Usagi, tries not to laugh.
MOTOKI
Hajime—uh, well, we. . .
Usagi walks up behind Motoki, still facing Makoto.
MOTOKI
We’ve already. . . kind of--
USAGI
(to Motoki)
She’s young. . . energetic. . . and looking to join the workforce.
MOTOKI
That’s. . .
(claps hands)
Great! That’s really. . . yeah, we need. . . young people, with energy. . . working.
You could cut the awkwardness with a knife. Makoto pretends to look through her bag.
MAKOTO
(faking)
Ah!
(beat)
Whaddaya know. . . forgot to bring a resume!
MOTOKI
Oh, *pfft*. . . “resumes”. . .
(waves his hand)
Relics! . . . what with the. . . Facebook. . . Who needs ‘em?
Makoto glances at Usagi, standing behind Motoki. Usagi gives the thumbs up.
Monday, August 1, 2011
I couldn't just make up an African country that didn't sound really silly. . .
Last time. . .
We Now Continue.
CUT TO:
INT, Mamoru's Bedroom
Mamoru rises out of bed, peacefully. A rarity these days. He looks. . . dissappointed, somehow.
CUT TO:
INT, Mamoru's Condo, Hallway
We follow Mamoru, now in his usual sharp attire, as he walks toward the kitchen. As he goes down the hall, he passes by a large window, revealing a small but professional RECORDING STUDIO, complete with a PIANO, HUNDREDS OF RECORDS, MIXING STUDIO, the works. Now we know how the "Chiba family" makes their money.
BANDANA(V.O.)
Guess what? I have a son!
CUT TO:
INT, Kitchen
We see BANDANA talking, solemnly, into a phone down another hallway. MAMORU observes from a distance, in the kitchen.
BANDANA
(into phone)
Yeah. . . didn't see that one coming, did you? Mamo-- that's his name, Mamoru--
(sighs)
-- well, he was in a car wreck, and--
MAMORU takes a look around the kitchen-- it's a mess. There are dirty dishes and pieces of garbage everywhere. He starts to pick up some of the garbage. He's sullen-- this isn't what he wanted to do with his morning.
BANDANA
(into phone)
. . . well, it's a long story, but. . . I adopted him!
(pause)
Listen, there's something I really--
(Pause-- we can barely hear a voice from the other end now)
Hello? . . . Shingo?
MAMORU stops and turns toward BANDANA.
BANDANA
(into phone)
Shingo! Hi!
(pause)
No. . . no, Shingo, please--
(pause-- then crying)
Don't do this, please! I need to--
We hear a click. Bandana, looking as if she's been punched in the stomach, slowly hangs up the phone and walks off, without noticing Mamoru. Not having any idea what to do, Mamoru goes back to picking up the pieces.
CUT TO:
INT, Living Room
Mamour sits down on the couch, and takes a look at his watch.
MAMORU
(whispering)
Dammit!
Mamoru starts putting on his socks when--
HINO(O.S.)
Who was that?
MAMORU turns around, shocked to see TAKASHI HINO, cabinet minister and father to his girldfriend, standing in his living room, smoking a cigarette.
HINO
(gesturing to hallway)
On the phone. Who was she talking to?
HINO slumps onto the couch.
MAMORU
Oh, that, I. . . I wouldn't, uh. . .wait, what are you doing here?
HINO turns on the TV.
HINO
Hell, you wouldn't know, would you.
MAMORU
Why you're here, or --?
HINO
(looking at Mamoru's socks, changing the subject)
School's cancelled today.
(sarcastic)
In light of the tragedy.
HINO flips through channels. Most of the channels are playing footage of Tokyo Big Sight.
HINO
Christ. You just can't escape it.
Suddenly, the channel flipping stops. We see a shot of a crystal shard-- one that bears resemblance to the crystal we saw in the CRYSTAL CHAMBER.
REACTION SHOT of Mamoru-- he recognizes that shard from his dreams. (Just go with it)
HINO
(to BANDANA)
Good morning, sunshine!
MAMORU turns to see BANDANA standing in the hallway. Her forced smile can hardly conceal her fuming rage.
BANDANA
Good morning, Mamo-kun.
(to Hino)
Minister.
HINO
"Minister?"
Hino points to Mamoru, who's torn between the TV screen and the soap opera unfolding before his eyes.
HINO
(sarcastically)
Oh. . . I get it. THIS why you asked me to leave at six in the damn morning.
BANDANA, about to explode, turns and walks back down the hall.
HINO
(yelling down the hall)
You called me!
(beat, then raises the remote)
Jeeze!
Hino is about to change the channel, just another image of the crystal shard comes onto the screen. Mamoru, as if snapping out of a trance, stops him.
MAMORU
Wait!
HINO
(indignant)
What?
MAMORU fixates on the screen, as if it holds the meaning of life itself. Hino looks back and fourth between Hino and the screen.
HINO
You recognize it?
(beat)
Mamoru?
At that moment, we hear a J-poppy tune being played on a piano in the background.
HINO
I guess Rei must've told you about it, huh?
(beat)
That. . . is the Imperial Silver Crystal.
Mamoru snaps his head toward Hino.
HINO
(looking back into the hall)
Incredible. She leaves the door to her sound-proofed studio wide open while she plays the piano. THAT, Mamoru, is a lesson in feminine subtlety.
MAMORU
Wait-- THAT'S the Imperial Silver Crystal?
HINO
Oh, yeah. One of the national treasures of Sierra Lione. Imperial-- . . . or Imperium. No-one seems to be quite sure what it's called.
MAMORU
You said. . . Rei told me?
HINO
Didn't she?
(beat)
Well, that's where you're going on Friday night. You, me, Rei, and some of Japan's most powerful men, will be the honoured guests as "Princess Diamond" herself--
(quieter, sarcastic)
--that's what all the lefty do-gooders call her--
(loud again)
-- presents the Imperial Silver Crystal to a group of Japanese researchers.
MAMORU looks at the TV again. Suddenly, things are starting to make sense. Then--
REI
Dad?
Mamoru turns to find REI standing in the living room, shocked to find her father at Mamoru's place. We then turn to Hino. He's shocked to find her there too. For a moment, he loses his sense of smug composure.
REI
What are you doing here, Dad?
Hino's shocked appearance doesn't last. He turns to MAMORU.
HINO
Well. . . You're up to your eyes in Hinos today, aren't you?
(pause)
Wait--
(turns to REI)
How did YOU get in here, anyway?
CUT TO:
INT, Hallway Outside Mamoru's Condo
MAMORU and REI in the hallway.
MAMORU
You could've buzzed, Rei.
REI slams the door shut, still disgusted at what she saw.
MAMORU
So what's going on?
REI
I need a witness.
REI starts down the hallway.
MAMORU
Wait, what?
REI stops and turns around.
REI
I need someone to follow me, to see everything that I do and everything that I see, and tell me that I'm NOT completely insane.
MAMORU
(sarcastically)
Oh, sure. This is all incredibly sane.
REI continues on her way.
MAMORU
Rei, I can't just--
MAMORU glances back toward the door, and thinks twice about whether he really wants to stay in the same apartment as BANADA and HINO this morning.
MAMORU
(sighs)
Jesus, wait up.
We Now Continue.
CUT TO:
INT, Mamoru's Bedroom
Mamoru rises out of bed, peacefully. A rarity these days. He looks. . . dissappointed, somehow.
CUT TO:
INT, Mamoru's Condo, Hallway
We follow Mamoru, now in his usual sharp attire, as he walks toward the kitchen. As he goes down the hall, he passes by a large window, revealing a small but professional RECORDING STUDIO, complete with a PIANO, HUNDREDS OF RECORDS, MIXING STUDIO, the works. Now we know how the "Chiba family" makes their money.
BANDANA(V.O.)
Guess what? I have a son!
CUT TO:
INT, Kitchen
We see BANDANA talking, solemnly, into a phone down another hallway. MAMORU observes from a distance, in the kitchen.
BANDANA
(into phone)
Yeah. . . didn't see that one coming, did you? Mamo-- that's his name, Mamoru--
(sighs)
-- well, he was in a car wreck, and--
MAMORU takes a look around the kitchen-- it's a mess. There are dirty dishes and pieces of garbage everywhere. He starts to pick up some of the garbage. He's sullen-- this isn't what he wanted to do with his morning.
BANDANA
(into phone)
. . . well, it's a long story, but. . . I adopted him!
(pause)
Listen, there's something I really--
(Pause-- we can barely hear a voice from the other end now)
Hello? . . . Shingo?
MAMORU stops and turns toward BANDANA.
BANDANA
(into phone)
Shingo! Hi!
(pause)
No. . . no, Shingo, please--
(pause-- then crying)
Don't do this, please! I need to--
We hear a click. Bandana, looking as if she's been punched in the stomach, slowly hangs up the phone and walks off, without noticing Mamoru. Not having any idea what to do, Mamoru goes back to picking up the pieces.
CUT TO:
INT, Living Room
Mamour sits down on the couch, and takes a look at his watch.
MAMORU
(whispering)
Dammit!
Mamoru starts putting on his socks when--
HINO(O.S.)
Who was that?
MAMORU turns around, shocked to see TAKASHI HINO, cabinet minister and father to his girldfriend, standing in his living room, smoking a cigarette.
HINO
(gesturing to hallway)
On the phone. Who was she talking to?
HINO slumps onto the couch.
MAMORU
Oh, that, I. . . I wouldn't, uh. . .wait, what are you doing here?
HINO turns on the TV.
HINO
Hell, you wouldn't know, would you.
MAMORU
Why you're here, or --?
HINO
(looking at Mamoru's socks, changing the subject)
School's cancelled today.
(sarcastic)
In light of the tragedy.
HINO flips through channels. Most of the channels are playing footage of Tokyo Big Sight.
HINO
Christ. You just can't escape it.
Suddenly, the channel flipping stops. We see a shot of a crystal shard-- one that bears resemblance to the crystal we saw in the CRYSTAL CHAMBER.
REACTION SHOT of Mamoru-- he recognizes that shard from his dreams. (Just go with it)
HINO
(to BANDANA)
Good morning, sunshine!
MAMORU turns to see BANDANA standing in the hallway. Her forced smile can hardly conceal her fuming rage.
BANDANA
Good morning, Mamo-kun.
(to Hino)
Minister.
HINO
"Minister?"
Hino points to Mamoru, who's torn between the TV screen and the soap opera unfolding before his eyes.
HINO
(sarcastically)
Oh. . . I get it. THIS why you asked me to leave at six in the damn morning.
BANDANA, about to explode, turns and walks back down the hall.
HINO
(yelling down the hall)
You called me!
(beat, then raises the remote)
Jeeze!
Hino is about to change the channel, just another image of the crystal shard comes onto the screen. Mamoru, as if snapping out of a trance, stops him.
MAMORU
Wait!
HINO
(indignant)
What?
MAMORU fixates on the screen, as if it holds the meaning of life itself. Hino looks back and fourth between Hino and the screen.
HINO
You recognize it?
(beat)
Mamoru?
At that moment, we hear a J-poppy tune being played on a piano in the background.
HINO
I guess Rei must've told you about it, huh?
(beat)
That. . . is the Imperial Silver Crystal.
Mamoru snaps his head toward Hino.
HINO
(looking back into the hall)
Incredible. She leaves the door to her sound-proofed studio wide open while she plays the piano. THAT, Mamoru, is a lesson in feminine subtlety.
MAMORU
Wait-- THAT'S the Imperial Silver Crystal?
HINO
Oh, yeah. One of the national treasures of Sierra Lione. Imperial-- . . . or Imperium. No-one seems to be quite sure what it's called.
MAMORU
You said. . . Rei told me?
HINO
Didn't she?
(beat)
Well, that's where you're going on Friday night. You, me, Rei, and some of Japan's most powerful men, will be the honoured guests as "Princess Diamond" herself--
(quieter, sarcastic)
--that's what all the lefty do-gooders call her--
(loud again)
-- presents the Imperial Silver Crystal to a group of Japanese researchers.
MAMORU looks at the TV again. Suddenly, things are starting to make sense. Then--
REI
Dad?
Mamoru turns to find REI standing in the living room, shocked to find her father at Mamoru's place. We then turn to Hino. He's shocked to find her there too. For a moment, he loses his sense of smug composure.
REI
What are you doing here, Dad?
Hino's shocked appearance doesn't last. He turns to MAMORU.
HINO
Well. . . You're up to your eyes in Hinos today, aren't you?
(pause)
Wait--
(turns to REI)
How did YOU get in here, anyway?
CUT TO:
INT, Hallway Outside Mamoru's Condo
MAMORU and REI in the hallway.
MAMORU
You could've buzzed, Rei.
REI slams the door shut, still disgusted at what she saw.
MAMORU
So what's going on?
REI
I need a witness.
REI starts down the hallway.
MAMORU
Wait, what?
REI stops and turns around.
REI
I need someone to follow me, to see everything that I do and everything that I see, and tell me that I'm NOT completely insane.
MAMORU
(sarcastically)
Oh, sure. This is all incredibly sane.
REI continues on her way.
MAMORU
Rei, I can't just--
MAMORU glances back toward the door, and thinks twice about whether he really wants to stay in the same apartment as BANADA and HINO this morning.
MAMORU
(sighs)
Jesus, wait up.
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